Helping women in their middle and elder years to live with vitality and purpose.
Haere mai; welcome
Midlife changes and perimenopause can start as a whisper. A sore hip. Sleepless from 3am. A short fuse. Tears as your teen drives away for the first time.
For some women, this turning point goes almost unnoticed. For many others though, midlife and menopause impact every aspect of wellbeing: from health, mood, career and relationships, through to a sense of peace, life spark, purpose and identity. It can all be a bit much.
Counselling offers a space to reflect and make sense of how this time is unfolding for you. Together we can find practical ways to navigate immediate challenges, and explore deeper patterns, strengths, and values that can sustain you on the path ahead. So that your next chapter might be about flourishing and building a life that you love, even amidst the changes that life and aging bring.
A little about me
My homeland is South Africa, where many moons ago I trained as a psychologist, earning my masters. I lived for a long time in Australia, where I ran a private practice; and recently we moved to beautiful Taranaki, Aotearoa (New Zealand).
I’m Rina, mum to 3 now adult children and a joyful, hilarious golden retriever. I have full registration here as a counselling psychologist, with a special interest in women’s health and wellbeing, grief, chronic pain, menopause and aging.
How counselling can help
Whether you’re in midlife or your elder years, together we can work on
Building emotional resilience for the years ahead
Clarifying your values, purpose and direction
Creating sustainable health habits
Building skilful ways of responding to anxiety, low mood, anger, relationship stress
Improving sleep
Managing overwhelm, stress and burnout
Loosening the grip of patterns such as imposter syndrome, people-pleasing and perfectionism
Navigating grief, loss and life's transitions
Living well alongside chronic health conditions
I also offer supervision for Health Improvement Practitioners (HIPs), and EAP support through Clearhead.
Getting started
How to access appointments
For a chat to see whether this will be a good fit for you, or to book initial appointment, please text or give me a ring on 026 686 5609, or email hello@rinabelgraver.com.
A referral isn't needed for private psychology appointments. EAP appointments can be booked through Clearhead. ACC-funded appointments are not available.
Returning clients are welcome to access their calendar portal here, to book, change or cancel sessions.
Location
Appointments are in-person at my consulting room in New Plymouth, or via secure video or telephone, New Zealand-wide.
Fees
I value making therapy as affordable as possible, and so offer both traditional 50-minute appointments ($160) and brief, focused 30-minute appointments ($80).
Half hour appointments
These are ideal when you would like focused and practical support with, for example, sleep, emotional eating, stress, diabetes, increasing physical activity or self-care. You might also find these work well if you just want to check in or refresh a skill.
My approach
I draw primarily on ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), including
CBT-I (Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy for Insomnia), for help with sleep
ERP (exposure and response prevention) for OCD and body repetitive behaviours
non-diet, weight neutral approaches for emotional eating and body image
fACT (focused Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), for the half- hour appointments.
Since arriving in Aotearoa I’ve been discovering the beautifully holistic Te Whare Tapa Whā model of wellbeing. ‘Mauri tū mauri ora’ literally means ‘the alert life force begets life’… when the walls of our wellbeing are supported and tended to - our taha wairua (spiritual wellbeing), taha hinengaro (mental and emotional wellbeing), taha tinana (physical health), taha whānau (relationships) and connection to whenua, earth and nature - then we will thrive and flourish.
Many people, with each trip around the sun, notice a yearning for life to be quieter and simpler, or more expansive. There’s often a sharpening sense of what matters and what doesn’t. A softening of the drive for striving and external validation. Tolerance for bullshit and people-pleasing, no more.
These are not accidental patterns, and can be harnessed to help build our next chapter. Menopause offers a chance to remember parts of ourselves that have long been neglected, and to discover new ways of living that are wholehearted and more deeply your own.
Did you know that several species of whale also go through menopause? (hm, may this be a peaceful transition for these magnificent creatures). After raising young they are wired to continue in their elder years, to contribute to their communities as guides and protectors.